When Conrad gets a new toy, he gets obsessive about it.
So obsessive that often times we end up having to take the toy away from him because
he won't eat or take baths or sleep without the toy....
It's. not. healthy.
His new obsession:
a white horse, oh, and his black horse too.
(because he can't just have ONE he's got to have TWO horses says my mother in law....
the kid is officially spoiled. It's embarrassing.)
Giving the horse a french kiss:
This is my son refusing to let his horse go so he can take a bath:
Precious isn't he?
Protesting:
I told Conrad that "the horse was going to sit in the sink and watch him take his bath, so please place the horse in the sink for Mommy, or i will do it for you myself. Do you want me to do it, or do you want to listen to Mommy like a big boy!" I'm trying to allow Conrad to make his own choices and decide to obey the specific command I'm giving him on his own will rather than ripping toys out of his hands, and if he makes the choice not to obey, he will have consequences.... I gave him the choice to put the horse on the counter or no one was taking a bath at all....(he has had a bath almost every night since he's been born,) To which he screamed in my face and threw himself on the ground.
He hates his mother. I'm convinced.
He collects himself after a few minutes and puts the horse on the counter. I am proud.
But my pride is short lived.
That little naked butt makes me smile.
After he obeys his mother and I am beaming with pride, He looks back at the horse and decides to start back up with his tantrum instead of getting in the bath. So at this point, I'm scrambling. I'm trying to figure out how to deal with the situation. A lightening bulb goes off in my head and I decide that maybe Conrad will enjoy giving his horse a bath! They would have fun, and I would be able to wash a days worth of stink off of his butt. Everyone wins right?! So I suggest we put the horsey in the bath-which was Conrad's original thought 5 minutes prior, (the thought that I originally disagreed with....)
He literally throws himself on the floor for seriously 6 whole minutes after I put the horse into the bath. I counted. It's my fault. I threatened one thing and did another. I went back on my threat that if he didn't put the horse on the counter, than no bath at all! So I tell him that we can give the horse a bath HOPING he might stop crying and acting like a total-brat!
Wrong.
I put the horse in the bath and then put Conrad in after him and I start sud-zing up the horse's mane.
Conrad flips out and starts crying even harder. The water is about 6 inches deep and my toddler thinks he's going to "throw himself down real hard in the bath tub" like he does when he's on the floor. This resulted in him face planting in the water, swallowing the water and then chocking on the water, almost dying, then proceeding to thrash at me with a water soaked face, clawing off my arms with his razor sharp toddler nails, his arms flailing and then slipping in the tub falling and screaming harder, JUST THEN DUSTIN'S KEYS TURN THE LOCK!
Yippee! Daddy is home! This whole scene makes me look like a total idiot mother.... In my mind, my HUSBAND is thinking, "MY WIFE IS A MESS...SHE CAN'T HANDLE IT. She can't hang.
She. is. weak..."Right as I hear Dustin hastily stomping through the hallway in his perfectly pressed slacks, dress shirt, leather loafers and
(one of his "artsy" Mr. jelly neck sweaters), my eye balls are shooting half way out in front of my face and I'm buckling under the weight of this ordeal. Before I can even kiss Dustin and say, "Hey babe! How was your day!"
with my lip gloss glaring in the light of the florescent bathroom lighting like a 50's house wife, my beautiful blouse looking fresh without even the slightest hint of pit stain..., I snap back into reality and quickly toss the "NAY" to Dustin and shout, "HIDE-THAT-DAMN-DEMON-HORSE!!" (he threw the soaked horse in the dryer and turned that bad boy on without a single explanation. That man doesn't skip a beat.) I washed my sons nether regions and swooped him from the bath, grabbed his "MEY-MEY" (Binky) from his crib in one swift motion and got him dressed with poise and grace....
It was stressful. But we made it through. An hour later after Conrad was totally asleep, I finally plopped down on the couch and asked my husband how his day was. He gave me a high five and told me I did good. I felt like a rock star of a mother. He was proud of me. I HAD WON.
So I'm at a cross roads with Conrad's "NAY." Do we abolish these obsessive toys all together? I fear his bond with these toys is unhealthy. The deadly plastic dinosaur, the Elmo chair and now Mr. Nay....
In other news, Conrad loves me when I "Pizza Pie" him. He calls it "
PEEE-PIE!" I wish someone would throw me in the air and let me free fall back into their arms over and over. That would rock so hard.
Weekly Surf:Any phrase you want
cut into woodObsessed with the art in
this nursery
A play kitchen
even a boy would enjoy {Side note, you know what really lights a fire under my ass? Pink shopping carts! I go to Target to let my son pull toys off of the shelves and find something new and exciting to play with....he makes a b-line to the shopping carts and starts putting stuffed animals in it, and baby dolls (ALL OF WHICH ARE WEARING PINK dresses! Why can't they make cute boy baby dolls with blue shirts!? Why don't they make babies for boys to play with?) He's filling up his shopping cart and having a ball so I decide to buy it for him, BUT IT'S BRIGHT PINK. Sure I could spray paint it orange, yellow, or blue but then it would look ghetto-ish. I was really sad that the store only had girl colors and not boy colors! Don't they know boys cook too and go shopping?!} Nothing says I love you like boxed brownies!
I wish I could have a normal conversation with someone without totally freaking them out by curling my lips over my braces. It's a new nervous habbit I've formed. Even my best friends refuse to speak to me during the lip-curl.
I can't quit it though....
{Have a really really great weekend friends.}
