Thursday, July 16

Go Girl


 I really wish this device  was handy a few days ago when I was out on a trail running, far far from a bathroom, or a kind neighbor who might let me in to relieve myself when my mornings coffee suddenly hit and I needed to think fast before an "accident" was going to happen. 
 So... 
I called my husband to ask his advice and he told me to find a bush....

"A bush??!!! There are NO bushes! What the heck am I going to do?!"

I tried to call a friend who lived close by, but she was at work- So I attempted to stall the accident, squeeze my cheeks together as hard as I could and sprint to the car....that seemed to make it worse....so I stopped sprinting. I tried to waddle to the car, looking even more ridiculously obvious....and then I was like "Oh crap!"  

The good thing about me is that I'm a fast thinker, I just did like my mama taught me and popped a squat behind the power box hoping the fine people of Seven Hills wouldn't happen to walk by and ask me what I was doing. I've peed on high ways, in lakes, and pools, but never have I done my business behind a power box! (The power box was tall and I used my stroller to shield me...plus, little kids have to learn how to just go anywhere right? It's better than going in your pants! I'm just starting him really young!)

Later Dustin asked me what I ended up doing, and I told him I "went camping" 
in Seven Hills, and his response was "That's my girl!"

It's funny the situations we find ourselves in.

But had I had this cool little contraption, It might not have been such an uncomfortable ordeal. If someone happened to stop to ask me what I was doing, I could have just shown them the box and said,"It's this cool thing called "Go Girl." I keep it with me so that if I'm ever out doors, like camping or in a residential neighborhood....I can just do my business! You should really keep one in your purse!" 

Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do right?? 

3 comments:

  1. This was soooo funny, I'm sitting here laughing so hard.
    You're cute my darling grandaughter

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  2. WOW...this gives a whole new meaning to "Pop-A-Squat" or an "Electrifying Bowel Movement"...I'm glad I have taught you the gift of 'spontaneity' and 'quick thinking on your butt-cheeks (not feet). I hope it was a graceful 'movement' ha-ha-hee :)

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  3. Mother, Don't say electrifying bowel movement again....I'm mortified! I thought I'd poke fun at myself with this story but maybe I over-shared?? What's wrong with me??!

    Either way, I thought it was entertaining. Glad you thought so too....

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