Post Baby Ramblings.

Thoughts on the last 2 weeks with my newest squishy-squisher-fancy-faced-button-nosed-lady....

(Yes, the dreadfully adorable little nicknames are totally necessary and I say them in the squeakiest-most annoyingest voice you could ever imagine.)

Thoughts on the last 2 weeks:

-When my husband calls her his "honey girl" as he changes her diaper, I melt into a puddle on the floor. Hearing him tell her how pretty she is makes me swoon. You'd think he was giving me a complement.

-The novelty of waking up 3+ times a night to nurse my baby has sadly worn off. It was fun but now I'm straight zombie-status-tired y'all. Like, at first, I'd hear her little perfect lips smack together ever so daintily and politely (She doesn't cry, she just smacks her lips when she's hungry. It's not even right the level of adorableness oozing out of that tiny, sweet body). At first, it was new and fun, like having a new puppy waiting for you when you got home from school... I'd joyfully wake up in the wee hours of the night, spring forth from my soft, warm mattress and do a little heel click as I jumped in the air with excitement to spend time with my sweet baby girl feeding her and watching (my boyfriend) Jimmy Fallon....on TV. NOW though, the lack of sleep has caught up with me and by the time I realize she's done with her meal, already passed out with the nip is out of her mouth, I've fallen asleep myself. I'm so tired at night sometimes, it's a wonder my eyes don't start bleeding.

-Naps are a must. I'm learning that if I don't nap when they both nap, I'm not a very nice mommy & I'm not as patient with Elle at night. The discipline of napping has come easy for me.

- The task of raising a daughter is daunting and all together frightening in a way that I never experienced with Conrad, a boy. She needs to be protected in her youth and wooed by her father, dated by her dad and his job of showing her how she should be treated by men needs to be so superior that the average dude will not stand a chance when it comes to winning her heart the way her dad did as she grew up. Raising a daughter scares me. What if she hates me, what if she loves me, what if we're so a like we drive each other crazy, what if she's more of a "daddy's girl", what if she pierces her belly button behind my back or sneaks out of her window to hang out with lame teenage douche bag boys, what if she ends up having really good taste and wants to always borrow my clothes.... (hi mom!) Ugh. The thought of raising a teenage girl stresses me out.

Elle wearing one of Conrad's new born outfits.

-I've learned that a good friend brings you herbal ointment for your raging roid, texts you to ask how your baby is breast feeding, brings you a really fattening meal, brings her kid over to play with your kid so you can have a break and talk to an adult for a few hours, comes over late at night when you're engorged and frazzled to help you latch your baby and give you the confidence you need to be the mom you want to be, prays for you when you need it and brings you sweet baby girl clothes (so your baby doesn't look like a boy...) Thank you, to my incredible friends who have really made me feel so loved. My heart is full.

-Another thing I've learned since having a baby is, DON'T under any circumstances take a mirror down town and check things out. I don't care who you are. Don't do it. I don't know why I felt like it was necessary to investigate the lady parts, but I did. And then I cried and panicked and called another mom friend who assured me that IT DOES go back to normal and then in her, "what the hell were you thinking?!" voice said, "Um, Chelsea, you had a baby 2 weeks ago! Why are you looking down there?!" No one tells you that stuff is going to be shifted around down stairs! Why isn't anyone telling anyone this? I know I "over share" way too much. It's probably unhealthy how much I over share, but lets be real here. Things look a teeny tiny bit different. *For the record, I would have rather torn all the way to my bung hole if it meant being able to birth her how I did. That's just for the record though. 

-Those woman who say that they were back in their skinny jeans the same week they had their baby are bitches. Seriously. But then again, those same bitches probably aren't consuming carrot cake muffins with butter cream frosting at 3am after they feed their baby (450 calories per cake. No joke.) Sure I could exercise a little self control, but DUDE, I feel like a ravaging beast. I'm eating like a 15 year old boy. It's kind of insane and embarrassing how much I eat. But it STILL doesn't make me hate those skinny,
one-week-post-baby, skinny jeans wearing bitches any less....

-Men who wear babies are hot. Period.

-No one told me how fun having two would be. My favorite thing so far was when we were driving to see the midwife in the car for the first time as a family and Conrad pointed to an air plane and shouted, "Look Elliotte, air plane!!!" Or every time we get out of the car, I unbuckle Conrad first and he always says, "Get baby mom. Get baby!" It's cute that he's so concerned for her, OR that he assumes I'd leaver her in the car and forget her..... Either way, it's friggin adorable.

-Another thing I've learned, my husband isn't as comfortable with me nursing in public without a cover as I am with nursing in public without a cover. First off, who wants to eat under a dark sheet, and secondly, who cares. I highly doubt anyone is looking at my boob and getting aroused. We're still in the getting the hang of it stage where I really have to help her latch on properly, so doing that under the cover is really difficult. Plus, we were in the movie theater, so that makes it right I guess.

-The first day alone with two kids, by myself wasn't as scary as I thought it would be.

Our first date, post baby, with baby. 5$ movie night is the best. 

We saw Crazy Stupid Love and I highly recommend it.

{The last two weeks with my new honey girl have been utterly amazing.}