Baby gets fed, I drink a sip of coffee, scarf down a granola bar & banana, put on my extra tight sports bra so my jugs don't go flyin' around, and I'm off to run the trail by my house before the sun gets too hot or baby needs his nap.
It's a beautiful day, weathers nice, theres a little gust of wind, it's wonderful. I've got energy and I've got Beyonce blaring on the ipod. I'm really starting to feel the burn in my legs and I'm breaking a sweat, "Go Chels" is what I'm thinking. As I'm running I'm remembering the cheese cake I ate the night before at 3 AM after I fed the baby and needed a snack, or the roast beef sandwich earlier this week again at 3 AM, or the blue berry muffin and extra large glass of milk, and I'm thinking to myself "You go girl, burn those treats right off your ass!" Work it girl!" and I push myself on. (Breast feeding makes you super hungry...)
Then Conrad decides he's had enough of my shenanigans and the heat is too much, so he starts to throw a fit. I don't blame him...So I stop the train, try to comfort him, put a thin blanket around the stroller so the sun isn't in his eyes, I reinsert his pacifier, and we're back on the trail. Then he cries louder and this time he's not messin around. So i quickly stop, grab my baby Bjorn out of the bottom of the stroller, grab Conrad out and start to put him in the Bjorn when I realize my jogging stroller is headed off of the trail full speed ahead and all I can do is watch it roll right off of the steep edge of the trail in slow motion, and into a rocky deserty ditch....
I thought about running after it, but then realized it wasn't going to happen. I watched the back tires go over the front tire and everything fly into the air. My ipod, cell phone, sun glasses, sun screen, everything you can imaging being in the baby bag flew out as well...it was a disaster. So i stopped two kind ladies and asked them if they could hold my screaming baby while I made my way down this steep rocky hill to retrieve my belongings. A man came along and assisted me, thank God, and I tried my darnedest not to lose my mind and fall apart. I looked like a damn retard having a stranger hold my infant while a man helped me collect stray diapers and handed me my bottle of breast milk with dirt all over it....it was awesome. Not.
Then when the stroller was safely back on the trail, all 3 of my helpers kept repeating phrases like, "Thank God the baby wasn't in the stroller...can you imagine! Thank God!" as I'm shaking like a leaf. (My nerves were shot, and I was quite embarrassed to say the least...) I quickly grab my baby, thank them and put him back in his Bjorn...he screamed for the entire 12 minutes of me speed walking back to the car!
What a great work out.
I know, that's what I was thinking too.
So i feel like the worlds biggest idiot-mother who let the stroller roll into a ditch. There you go, if you've let your baby roll off of a piece of furniture, or called poison control because the baby you were watching ate nail polish (I'm raising my hand) don't feel so bad.
I told my cousin this story tonight and I told her that I felt like telling those kind Samaritans "Of course the baby wouldn't have been in the stroller, you morons, He's my main focus, I was so focused on getting him out as soon as possible, that I totally forgot to put the break on my stroller, HENCE THE WHOLE STROLLER IN THE DITCH THING??!!
that's my life story!
In other news, Conrad rolled from his belly half way onto his back yesterday. I have a video to prove it. It's riveting.....no seriously, I'm sure it's super boring if you're not a mom but i'm posting it anyway.....The video is like 3 minutes of me waiting for him to roll over half way....what can I say.